THE MIRROR EFFECT

A few posts ago, in The nature of Fear, I referred to 'bartering my power', let’s get a good feel for what this is about…

We are creators, we are always creating.

Although it may not feel like we are at the helm of our lives, when we experience feelings of despair, frustration and hopelessness. It is not until we see what we are ‘up to’ - not from our results out in the world, but by tuning into our inner world that change truly becomes possible. This is where we stop fighting and start listening.

So, how do we get into this state, into the inner world - the subconscious?

You will have had glimpses and even insights into your belief systems. These beliefs, made up childhood presumptions and uninspected fears lie just behind the threshold of the logical mind. A barrier in the mind that breaks down under pressure, leaking the undercurrents of our beliefs into our daily lives… not in neat tidy little packages that we can make sense of, but in the form of unwanted feelings and unhelpful repetitive thought patterns.

Years of self enquiry, observation and a huge learning journey of my own, helps me guide people out of their mental landscape ‘of what they already know’, into the unknown. Helping light the path, not along the voice of the logical mind but of your heart. Your heart, for it has witnessed it all... your hurts, your joys, your desires, your fears and unmet needs and your generosity of spirit.

Making this connection is powerfully healing. In this state are able to release the grip that the habit of years of judging ourselves has around our heart, and seek to understand ourselves naturally from a place of compassion. In this moment we have changed everything… from this moment on we are healing, and there is no turning back, because it feels sooooo good! And now we also deeply know, it was ourselves all along, we are the ones creating what we are feeling, we have been writing the script and we have been acting in our own play!

So, where are we bartering our power?

In our formative years, our interpretations of how we fit into the world and most importantly how we get our needs met were created… wired into the brain in strong impressions, not of logic, which was yet unformed, but in the universal language of feeling. This is how we created our baseline survival strategies. These strategies become an issue for us, when we have placed our inner needs from ourself, out into the world for others to provide for us…

"I will behave this way so you will give me what I need the most… the feeling that I am loved"

Now bear in mind that personal interpretation of ‘loved’ is as unique as a fingerprint to each of us. And this my friends is today’s key, for when you discover for yourself what your own combination of love is, you will never abandon yourself again and you will be on fire with purpose… more on that in another post.

You can probably look at your own life and see these unspoken exchanges of power, often most exaggerated and painfully complicated with our dearests and nearests. Playing out in a seemingly unbreakable pattern.

What is the point of all of this? The perfection of life gifting us is … the seed of wisdom lies waiting within the experience of each lesson.

‘We’ repeat ‘our’ pattern until ‘we’ allow ourselves to question, what is this situation mirroring to me about myself? To look, what am I ‘up to’? To learn, what am I trying to create?

So, if a relationship aka a pattern is really in your face, you my dear are gearing up for a change... that bound up energy is demanding your attention... because you are able to create more than this!

Here’s another way to think of it… it’s like upgrading how we meet our needs. Seeing what we are ‘up to’ helps us understand our needs, take ownership of them, responsibility for them and integrate our ‘emotional needs’ into our adult self. Allowing us to create more meaningful and genuine relationships that help us explore who we are as love, rather than bartering for love outside of ourselves.

Our logical mind cannot have this conversation with our inner world. Until they are connected through the heart, a state of deep relaxation and simple presence that allows for enquiry and revelation… at that stage the mind is merely a scribe ‘taking note’ of the brilliance of our being.